Spouse by Shobhaa de

Spouse: The Truth About Marriage by Shobhaa De 

Spouse is a non-fiction book that explores the realities, myths, and challenges of marriage, particularly within the context of modern Indian society. The book draws on De's own experiences as a twice-married mother of six, as well as her observations of other couples, to offer a pragmatic and candid look at relationships. 

Key aspects of the book

Breaks down stereotypes: 

De challenges traditional expectations and societal rules about marriage. She addresses common dilemmas, such as the "saas-bahu" (mother-in-law and daughter-in-law) dynamic, the importance of romance, and the need for honesty within a partnership.

Offers modern, non-preachy advice: While some of the advice has been compared to a grandmother's wisdom, De presents it with a modern, practical edge. She discusses topics like sex, careers, finances, and balancing family life in a way that resonates with contemporary couples.

A mix of traditional and modern perspectives: De blends traditional wisdom with contemporary suggestions. She explores how the institution of marriage has changed over time, particularly for women, who now have more options than previous generations.

Encourages realistic expectations: The book aims to help readers develop more realistic expectations about marriage. De argues that the institution is often flawed and erratic and that true happiness comes from understanding the relationship's dynamics rather than expecting a fairytale romance.

Focuses on communication and change: A significant takeaway from the book is that couples need to adapt to each other's moods and changing roles over time. For De, marriage is a dynamic "adventure" that requires trust, companionship, and open communication to last a lifetime.

Empowers women to leave unhappy marriages: 

De advises couples on how to spot the "warning signs in a hopeless relationship" and, if necessary, to leave a marriage with their dignity intact.